Help! I am the leader in the 1-3 years room at my centre. My son is one of the children I care for and he is developing some extreme behaviour issues including pushing and hitting other children. It has become so bad, my boss has had parents coming to her because their son has had so many accident reports. I believe it is a jealousy issue but with no other centre in town to send my son to, I am fast running out of options!
So far we have tried the thinking chair, time out and the naughty corner. I am at a complete loss as to what to do!
Behaviour issues
Re: Behaviour issues
Hi Carmen26,
Let me start by saying I can imagine this situation must be very stressful for you and your poor little boy.
It is hard to share your Mum at the best of times.
How long have these issues been displayed??
Is he of an age where you can sit down with him and talk to him about his behaviour in a calm and relaxed fashion??
Let me start by saying I can imagine this situation must be very stressful for you and your poor little boy.
It is hard to share your Mum at the best of times.
How long have these issues been displayed??
Is he of an age where you can sit down with him and talk to him about his behaviour in a calm and relaxed fashion??
Re: Behaviour issues
Hi Carmen,
Bit of a tough situation your in. Sometimes it can be hard for a child to watch their mum be so attentive and caring towards another child. Your'e his mum and he wants you all to himself... I think from what it sounds like it may be a jealousy issue and he is acting out to get your attention.
I recently went to a difficult behavior seminar and the speaker said that when a child misbehaves it is commonly due to attention. For e.g when you're with some of the other children during this time he may hurt another child and then when you try and deal with it you're indirectly providing him with attention. So, the speaker recommended that during this sort of behavior don't provide any attention towards the child misbehaving. Simply take him and lead him away from the area for a couple of minutes and then return them to the activity. Don't even make the child apologies because a) they don't understand what sorry means b) this is providing more attention.
I recently tried this technique with one of my toddlers and it worked well. I had an issue with one of the boys throwing toys onto the floor. Even if i got him to pick it up he would continually do it, with a great big smile on his face. After constantly repeating that "toys stay on the table" I was at my wits end.So, the day after the seminar the boy did it again and this time I just took him by the hand, put him in book corner with a book. When he moved I just lead him back. I only sat him there for 2 minutes then he joined in again. He didn't do it for the rest of the day. The following day he did it again and I did exactly what I did before and now he hasn't done it since.
As this technique worked well for me it may not work for you, each child responds differently to techniques. Just try and give it a go and be consistent with it. Also tryband spend more time with your child while at home and at work. Encourage and reinforce all the positive behavior he is showing. Fingers crossed...
Let me know how it goes,
,
L.A
Bit of a tough situation your in. Sometimes it can be hard for a child to watch their mum be so attentive and caring towards another child. Your'e his mum and he wants you all to himself... I think from what it sounds like it may be a jealousy issue and he is acting out to get your attention.
I recently went to a difficult behavior seminar and the speaker said that when a child misbehaves it is commonly due to attention. For e.g when you're with some of the other children during this time he may hurt another child and then when you try and deal with it you're indirectly providing him with attention. So, the speaker recommended that during this sort of behavior don't provide any attention towards the child misbehaving. Simply take him and lead him away from the area for a couple of minutes and then return them to the activity. Don't even make the child apologies because a) they don't understand what sorry means b) this is providing more attention.
I recently tried this technique with one of my toddlers and it worked well. I had an issue with one of the boys throwing toys onto the floor. Even if i got him to pick it up he would continually do it, with a great big smile on his face. After constantly repeating that "toys stay on the table" I was at my wits end.So, the day after the seminar the boy did it again and this time I just took him by the hand, put him in book corner with a book. When he moved I just lead him back. I only sat him there for 2 minutes then he joined in again. He didn't do it for the rest of the day. The following day he did it again and I did exactly what I did before and now he hasn't done it since.
As this technique worked well for me it may not work for you, each child responds differently to techniques. Just try and give it a go and be consistent with it. Also tryband spend more time with your child while at home and at work. Encourage and reinforce all the positive behavior he is showing. Fingers crossed...
Let me know how it goes,
,
L.A
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Re: Behaviour issues
My son is almost 2 but due to prematurity he has developmental delays so unfortunately no hope of him understanding a conversation. The issues have been on going since January as we were back at the centre after a 4 week breakout I think they are getting worse. I thought that if I ignored his behavior and got the other carers to discipline him instead, he would stop vying for my attention but the other carers seem reluctant to take such an approach as I am in the room with them.
Very frustrating!!!!
Very frustrating!!!!
Re: Behaviour issues
Thanks L.A. I will give this technique a try in the coming week and let you know!!!