Appropriate discipline of children

[megs_95]

Things are going rather well in my traineeship now but I have noticed a few things - from one or two staff - that seem wrong to me. One staff member I've seen handle children quite roughly, such as pulling them by their shirt to where they should be (when the child was running off, being silly, ignoring/being defiant to staff's requests). Another I've seen quite roughly pick up a child having a full meltdown tantrum (which is a frequent occurrence for the particular child) and just about dump her onto a bed...

As a new trainee I feel it's not my place to tell the other staff to stop, and at the same time, I feel I shouldn't go to the director because these staff in particular are likely to ask around til they find out who "told" and treat them differently.

I guess my question is, should I tell the director about things like this?
Plus - in these situations, what is the appropriate way to deal with a child? e.g. a toddler who is running around the room during group time when he should be sitting down, and screams "NO!" at staff when they ask him to sit, regardless of whether he is asked nicely or in a "cranky voice"... or a 2 year old who is crying and whining "for attention" as the room's staff say (and then they tell me to ignore her)? I find it difficult to just ignore a distressed 2 year old tugging at my leg wanting to be picked up and cuddled... surely there is some reason for the child crying so much, a reason for the child "wanting attention" as some of the staff have said?

Any help is appreciated
(p.s. not sure if this is the right section for this topic... sorry if it's wrong!)

[Lorina]

I've seen rough handling of children as well from other educators. When educators can't deal with the behaviour and are sick of putting up with it they get frustrated and annoyed and take it out on the child misbehaving. It does need to be brought to the attention of the director or room leader before it becomes a more serious issue. When you do go speak to the director about it tell her that this is a confidential matter. even if the staff do ask around just don't get involved and don't speak to anyone else about this issue...

Regarding group time for toddlers it should be no more than 10 minutes or even less. You can't expect toddlers to sit and listen for more than that. They get restless and bored. Instead of making this child sit down get him involved somehow. Give him a choice of the story to read during group time or what songs to sing or games to play etc. Instead of saying "come and sit down it's group time" you cold provide him with a choice where he cant reply with no. For example "it's group time, are you going to sit on the mat or on the chair" or "are you going to sit next to me or Jake (a friend)".

You're right about a child wanting attention, sometimes it's a little more than that. Feeling lonely, unwell, having a rough day, bored, tired etc. There could be more than going on than just wanting attention. Most of the time is not being stimulated enough. Talk to her parents, observe her and find out what her likes and interests are and try to provide those types of experiences. There is also nothing wrong with giving a cuddle every now and then, sometimes a toddler may just need it....

If you go our Wiki ----> Child Behaviour, there are a few articles available that have some strategies and techniques on dealing with behaviour.

Child Behaviour

You also need to remember that a toddler is supposed to be defiant, throw tantrums and misbehave. It's part of the "terrible twos" so to speak. They are becoming independent and testing limits. Yes, it can be frustrating at times to deal with but its a normal part of their development and you just need to provide support and try to guide them to understand and control their emotions.

In my opinion toddlers are the most difficult ages to work with. They require so much love, affection, understanding and support. However they are the most adorable ever!

I hope this gives you some ideas to go by...

Let me know how it goes,

,
L.A

[fchaudari76]

There is a fine balance between giving the children the right amount of affection and discipline sometimes and some staff struggle with this. I have found frustrations take over and the staff cannot get past the children's behaviours and then give them the cuddles etc when it is really required.

The toddler age group is very trying indeed and I know when I have been the GL with this age group I am very firm with them and on occasion it may be interpreted as harsh. Physically grabbing or manhandling children is NOT ok though regardless of what they are doing though yes I have restrained children who are lashing out but only to stop them harming themselves and others and yes sometimes I have lunged and grabbed a child who I know eg is about to bite or hit another child, sometimes you do it, the intention is not to hurt the child at all.

I have on occasion also had to physically pick up a child having a major tantrum and ask them to sit away from the group or on their bed too. I would not say I dumped the child but they were put down and told to stay where they were put until they could calm down and re-join their friends

However if you feel children are being hurt or their needs are being neglected I would speak to the leader of the room and maybe ask her to explain her behaviour management plans with you or speak to the Director however I feel you should allow the staff in the room to explain why they do what they do first