Unpredictable Aggression

[UnknownSkyla]

Hello everyone,

My name is Skyla and I live in regional Queensland. I have been working in childcare now for almost two years and along with that I work at the same centre that my (now 3 year old) son goes too. I hope this is the correct forum to post in about this topic.

Since my son started in childcare (age 15 months) he always had "problematic" behaviours. He was known to be a major biter, he would bite multiple children a day; mostly over sharing toys. He stopped biting when he moved in to 2 year old to 3 year old room. It seemed like the room leader in that room took the time to really invest in him and to gain to his love/respect. My son is also speech delayed; he cannot effectively communicate (mostly gibberish with some words in between. We are doing speech therapy). He has been very good in that room and recently after turning 3, he was to move in to the 3 to 4 year old room.

Transitions to new environments have always been challenging for him however after a month of learning the new room/routine he is fine. He has been in the 3 to 4 year old room now for a week and I had thought it was going well however I have been indirectly informed about him displaying unpredictable aggression in the form of pushing children over. He allegedly pushed a child over and the child seriously injured themselves as a result, management believe his strong obsession with cars had something to do with it as he is always holding one.

Now that you have the context; here is my main question:

I have been approached by assistant director asking to hold back my son and keep him in the 2 to 3 year old room where the ratio is smaller (1:5 oppose to the 3 to 4 year old room of 1:11) as they don't believe he is ready for the older room. As a parent, I do not agree with this as I feel like he is being treated differently because I am an educator and a parent. They want to hold him back for a few more months than try again.

This does not feel appropriate nor does it feel like it is helping my son as he would soon get bored of that 2 to 3 year old room and therefore may start to bite or act out more. There has been no formal documentation collected so far no observations or plan in place. No formal conversations had with me regarding how to help him with the transition.

I would love to know if anyone else has had similar experiences with a similar matter.

Thank you

[Lorina]

Hi Skyla,

Skyla, it sounds like you're navigating a challenging situation with a lot of thought and care. Your concerns about your son's transition and the suggestion to hold him back are valid, especially given his unique needs and your dual role as both an educator and a parent.

Here are a few steps you might consider:

Request Formal Documentation: Ask for formal observations and documentation of your son's behavior in the new room. This can provide a clearer picture of the challenges and help in creating a tailored plan for his transition.

Develop a Transition Plan: Work with the assistant director and the room leader to develop a transition plan that includes strategies to support your son. This might involve gradual transitions, consistent routines, and specific interventions to address his speech delay and aggression.

Involve Specialists: Since your son is already in speech therapy, consider involving his therapist in the transition process. They might offer valuable insights and strategies to support his communication and behavior in the new environment.

Communicate Openly: Have an open and honest conversation with the assistant director about your concerns. Emphasize the importance of consistency and the potential negative impact of holding him back without a clear plan.

Monitor Progress: Regularly monitor your son's progress and adjust the plan as needed. Keep communication lines open with the educators in the new room to ensure everyone is on the same page.

Your proactive approach and dedication to your son's well-being are commendable. By working collaboratively with the center's staff and specialists, you can create a supportive environment that helps your son thrive.

,
Lorina