Yet instead of celebrating, I feel as though somehow I failed momentously and now just want to crawl under a rock and hide.
I found that the children loved being with me (and would drop everything to run up to me in the mornings).
The parents only ever spoke positively to myself and Educators about seeing a male studying the profession and how their children were taking to me.
The Educators only ever had positive words to say (and I overheard several discuss how I fitted in and should be offered a job).
Yet…
I can count the conversations (sorry, sentences) that the Director spoke to me, on one hand….. and then I would have fingers to spare (spent most of the morning in the room, before they introduced herself to me).
Conversations with my mentor and the room leader weren’t much better, and the first week of placement saw me have to take the initiative to immerse myself into the children’s daily routines and care, because I was given no direction (walked into the room, was introduced and that was it).…. And it was the only way I could ensure that I was covering off my assessment competency requirements.
It wasn’t until the second week that I finally received any real feedback, which was that I was taking on more initiative then most (um- well, didn’t really have a choice in that one) and that I was developing positive relationships with the children. All good to be told this but I was still left struggling, almost begging to undertake tasks in order to demonstrate a competent ability for a pass mark.
What made it worse was having my forms at the end being signed to the comments of “is that it, ok, good luck with your other placements, bye”.
Is this normal experience for all? I am at a loss to understand an experience with such extremes in attitude.
I was so upset by the experience that I couldn’t even bring myself to say goodbye to the children, and that hurt a lot
And honestly, if I have to go through the same experience on another placement, I don't think I would continue.
Makes me so mad! 
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