Primary Schoolers Emotional Development
Children are now learning to be independent. When they feel worried or scared they may behave in ways which seem annoying such as boasting, disobedience, laziness or telling 'lies'. With understanding, attention and time children learn to overcome these things.
If there is a noticeable change in the child's behaviour it is advisable to look deeper and find out why.
School children can enjoy talking about emotions, feelings and relationships.
They begin to identify less with parents and more with peers as they continue through primary school..
Children this age may need their own personal space. This can be a bedroom, a bed, a special place (a tree, cubbyhouse) or a place for their own things. They still like hugs, kisses and cuddles, especially when doing things with you like watching TV or reading.
You can help your child's emotional development by:
setting a good example
talking about how you feel
giving the child examples of how to express their feelings
talking to them about their feelings
talking to your child's teacher as often as you can..
talking and listening.
How else can educators enhance children's emotional development?
Help the children gain an understanding of their feelings through the use of books, board games, puppets, interactive storytelling or role-plays.
Teach children to identify and verbalize their feelings, as well as to read the emotional signals from other children and adults. (For useful tools to promote emotional literacy, revisit
www.kellybear.com.)
Watch a child's facial expressions, posture, play or art work for signs that a child is experiencing a strong negative emotion. Then offer constructive ways to defuse it, such as painting, dialogue or taking a "time out."
Accept emotional responses as legitimate, even if you don't like the behavior the feeling produces. For example, when a child hits, the feeling of anger is demonstrated. Stop the child and say, "It's okay to feel angry; it's not okay to hurt others. Talk to me about what your feeling."
Communicate understanding and empathy by reflecting the observed emotion. For example, say, "You seem sad" or "You seem upset." Then, if the child confirms your reflection and begins talking, be quiet and listen. (See "Helping Children Cope with Anger" in Teacher Ideas,
www.kellybear.com .)
Observe the child's nonverbal behavior for clues as to how he or she is feeling. Listen for the content of what is being said, as well.
Avoid negative statements like, "Can't you do anything right?" or "What's your problem?" These comments discourage open communication and suggest that when a child does not behave perfectly, he or she is "bad."
Avoid moralizing ("That was wrong of you!"); humiliating ("I can't believe you did that."); lecturing ("You should have known better."); denying ("You'll be okay."); pitying, ("Poor you. It's all their fault."); and rescuing, ("I'll take care of it."). Instead, listen patiently and nod your head appropriately. Remember that questions can often lead the child away from the real problem or cause the child to stop talking.
Problem solve with the child by encouraging him or her to think of options and decide what constructive action to take. (See "Ten Ways to Foster Resiliency in Children" in Teacher Ideas,
www.kellybear.com .)
Keep lines of communication open. You might say something like: "Emily, I am glad you told me about your mom's illness. It must be hard to have her in the hospital. Please know that I care about you and that I am here if you want to talk again."
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