Aussie Childcare Network Forum

Hi could anyone help me out with the questions below, as I've been searching on the net and only found some answers as below:

What are the 4 stages of separation anxiety?
For each stage identify what behaviour might be expected from the child and how the carer can support the separation process.

Here are some of my answers and still looking for "???"
Stages: Protest
Behaviour: Frustration, anger, loud cries.
Support: Do not ignore them, Read him/her stories, Hold and cuddle him/her, Try and settle him/her

Stages: Despair
Behaviour: Very quiet, doesn't participate in activities.
Support: ???

Stages: Detachment
Behaviour: Plays by himself/herself, withdrawn from others, does not interact with peers .
Support: ????

Stages: Return adjustment
Behaviour: ????
Support: ???

Also, what questions and suggestion child care may ask to the mothers to develop a separation routine?


Thanks guys

Hi Peekaboo,

I found some information about each of the four stages and the behaviors displayed in each stage. Not too sure if this can help, however hopefully it should give you some ideas for this question. Funny thing is, I couldn't find anything about this in regards to children, this information is from the Army... Just have a read of it and change the ideas up to suit a child.

Four Stages of Separation
Everyone who faces separation goes through four basic stages. By becoming aware of these stages, we will be able to better cope. The departure-return cycle includes: Protest Against Loss or Departure, Despair, Detachment, and Return Adjustment.

PROTEST against your spouse's departure usually comes a week or two before they are due to leave. Spouses talk of feeling tense, selfish, unbelieving that he/she would actually leave, and guilty about not wanting their spouse to go. There is also frustration with the increased hours your spouse spends getting ready to deploy, your awareness of how many household chores and Family business must be handled before they go, and a bona fide physical and mental exhaustion for both spouses.

DESPAIR is the tearful period, which may come even before your spouse departs. Thoughts like "How will I ever live through this without him/her?" are common. There is also difficulty in sleeping due to general fear for one's safety. Even the usual noises in the house seem threatening. Remember that your children will be feeling the same way.

DETACHMENT is the level on which you live for most of the separation. It is a state of relative calm and confidence in handling day-to-day living. If a major crisis occurs, however, you may tend to revert to the states of Despair and Protest.

RETURN ADJUSTMENT is accompanied by awareness of the noises in the house. Many spouses experience an incredible emotional and physical frenzy getting every inch of the house and themselves ready for his/her arrival. The returning spouse arrives exhausted from the final days, eager to come home. The first days of unwinding bring long conversations to attempt to catch up. Finally, he/she spends lots of time sleeping. Also, be prepared for your spouse to spend a few days of "getting the equipment squared away" after he/she returns. Reference: http://www.hooah4health.com/deployment/ ... on.htm#ch3

Hope THis Helps!

Cheers
L.A